It’s Failure February already.

Here is a list of all the New Years resolutions I already failed at:

1.Get 30 minutes of exercise a day = 3 times a week at best.

2. Don’t eat dessert every day = have eaten dessert everyday accept for like 4 days when I fell asleep before I could.

3. Don’t ask people “So what do you DO?” instead ask them “What do you do for money?/What do you do for fun?” = totally bombed that one at the Super Bowl party yesterday.

4. Don’t impulse buy things. = I should just never go to Target again.

5. Be a model healthy frustration management and emotional capability to my kid = yeah…. until he laughs at me while ¬†throwing clean & folded laundry on the floor or the dog jumps all over the couch with poop on his paws.

6. Say more nice things than negative things = I might as well have said “teach a rainbow trout to ride side-saddle in two days.”